I WANT OUT

She heard his key on the door, about to open it. It was 3:30pm approximately, the same time he had arrived home from work in the last 35 years. She had always been looking forward to his arrival, with the late lunch on the table and a list of anecdotes of the day to discuss about. But the last two months had been different and the door noise was no longer a source of joy but a source of agony.

He was 61 and two months ago he had been told by his all-life employer that he was no longer needed in the company and that there was a good exit deal he’d better adhere to. On the façade he took it well, there would be much more time to read, to listen to music and to travel and he had work hard long enough. However, in his insight he was a bullet to his pride as he felt he was still doing an immensely valuable job for his company. And she knew his insight and she knew he was not fine.

So, when, that afternoon, he gave him the welcome kiss she was surprised to see a new shine in his beautiful green eyes. “I have good news”, he said. “Tell me”, she answered. She told her that Human Resources had contacted him informally to check whether he was interested in a 6-months role in the company – the time until he would leave – whose main task was to advice colleagues in the same situation as his on the tax implications of the “exit deal” and what would be the implications of the agreement for each individual. It was a nice goodbye position as it combined his latest expertise with direct support to peers of his whom trusted him.

HR told him that, if he wanted the role was his with the necessary condition that his manager would not object to his earlier departure from the department. Both thought that this was a trivial check. The following day he called HR in the morning to give his OK and once his manager arrived he presented her with the situation and his decision. She did not seem delighted with the idea but did not object directly. She concluded she would reflect and talk to HR.

He did not hear much for the next couple of days. Then one morning he received a phone call from HR. The outcome had been negative. His manager considered him critical in his position in the next six months and therefore the “nice exit” vanished. His manager called him in later in the day and gave an explanation filled in with words like “impossible”, “essential”, “great performer” that felt to him like knife stabs in his back. He accepted it as he always did, placing loyalty above anything else.

This happened 10 years ago and he was my father. I will not extend further as it is quite a sad story. At that time, it was painful to me and could not understand why a manager takes this type of decisions. Today, with a bit more managerial experience under my wings, I understood why she did it despite I still believe it was a totally wrong decision as a manager. Managers do not own their team members. They are just an instrument for their growth and development whilst fulfilling their tasks. We can decide who gets on our bus and when, but I firmly believe that it is up to each of our team members to decide on what stop they want to leave the bus.

-    Have you lived a similar situation as manager or employee? Are you satisfied with how you or your manager reacted to it? Were there understanding and a transparent discussion or threats or retaliations?

-      Do you think that performance development discussions drive faster needs to move on?